Ten Years Later...A Facebook Nomance

Now, I love Facebook and although it's getting stale, Myspace as well. As cliche as it sounds, it really has enabled me to keep in contact with friends and colleagues, as well as stalk ex-boyfriends (you do it too), and find new music, etc. Whatever, we're all on the social networking train. Facebook is CRAZY though, like...whoa. So many old friends and acqaintances from elementary school thru college have "found" me and while on one hand it's great, on another it's just so weird. I could go on and on about how "weird" it is, but honestly, I like it. I have reconnected with people I may have never seen again had it not been for this technology...I am able to share what is going on in my life and stay on top of what's going on with my friends...from my computer, or my phone. SO. This all leads me to HIM. (I am using alias's for the people I mention in my blog until further notice).

P.S. And by "HIM", I am not referring to our Lord and Savior, Baby Jesus. The HIM I speak of gave me butterflies everytime I saw him, made me so nervous I would walk the other way down the hall of our high school if I saw him coming...yep...HIM is my very own High School Crush. All this "HIM" stuff is freaking me out, so let's call him "Crush."

My infatuation with Crush began in 7th grade and lasted until 12th grade graduation. Looking back, I don't believe we ever even spoke more than a couple of words to each other, I can't even remember if we had that many classes together or not. I wish I could tell you guys his name...he has SUCH a crush worthy name. It was confirmed today that his picture in my yearbook DOES HAVE A HEART AROUND IT. I was pretty shocked myself at that one. If you asked me now why I had such a huge crush on Crush, I can't really say...he was and still is, absolutely adorable. I think every man I've dated has physically resembled Crush, so I guess even at 14 I had a type. Ok , because you're dying to know-Tall, Dark, Handsome. CREATIVE right? But there is something...In a school full of rich Orange County kids, and tons of future 30k millionaires and douchebags, Crush seemed like...a really nice, good guy. I think that's what drew me to him more than anything.

Ok, this blog is getting out of hand. I am no longer a high school freshman and I no longer get crushes on guys I don't really know. Once I graduated and no longer saw Crush everyday, my thoughts and desires of him faded in a heartbeat. I've met and loved some amazing men in the ten years since high school and hadn't thought about Crush until...THE DAY HE ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK. Wtf. Really??

So I add him...and for weeks, nothing. He hardly has any pictures, and not a lot going on on the page and I figured he just added me because we have like 75 mutual friends and are in all the same groups, etc. Oh, can I also please note that his profile said "single" when he added me? Come on, like I'm not going to notice. And jump for joy. Wait, what?

Without giving away too much as I haven't decided whether or not to share this blog with my facebook friends, Crush and I have been talking. Just friendly emails back and forth and back and forth...or a few I.M sessions. Through our convo's I've learned that Crush is getting back together with his ex girlfriend to try to make things work. His Facebook status now says "in a relationship." But seriously, I don't take those status things to seriously ya'll... I mean, mine says "Married to Blank Blank." Blank Blank is the gayest man I know, but a great friend. I love the reaction I get from people ("wait, you got married...yesterday?" lol).

To make a long story short (TOO LATE), I've learned that Crush is just another dude. He doesn't spell things correctly, which bugs me. He sometimes doesn't get my jokes, which totally bugs me too, because I'm hilarious. He's a financial planner who works too much and is tired every night. He is a complete doll, don't get me wrong...and it is really sweet when he tells me how pretty I am, or how shocked he is that I had a crush on him (yep I told him. Got no shame in my game, son!) Crush just doesn't have that same effect on me...because I don't know him yet, and I never did. Getting to know him as a friend is fun and makes me feel silly that I was ever intimidated by him. He's just a guy. I'm glad he found me and reached out...and I'm even more glad that I've realized that love doesn't happen from afar. And I'm so relieved I'm not a teenager anymore...now if I see a guy I want, I toss my hair, put some boots on and GO FOR IT...let him be the one intimidated...my days of that ended long ago.